Fairytale Corner: The Princess and the Mum who thought too much.

Anna — Mon, 12 Nov 2018 19:45:51 +0000

Once upon a time, in a land not so far away, lived a princess. Strictly speaking, she wasn’t ACTUALLY a princess. Her parents were not royalty, but she was a clever, sassy little girl who decided she was a princess. Who was anyone else to argue? One day, not long ago, the princess was giddy with excitement. She was going to attend a ball with all of her friends. A lot of planning and thought had gone into the evening and the princess had carefully selected her outfit and decided how she would wear her hair. It was going to be a joyous event. Now, the princess’ mother was not a wicked woman though she did, on occasion, make mistakes. She sometimes struggled in her attempt to help her daughter grow to be the strong, independent, free thinking woman she knew she would be. Having once been a young girl herself, she knew how hard it could be growing up and how mean other children could be. The mother was often conflicted, both wanting to protect her daughter whilst encouraging the princess to be whatever she wanted to be (even when she did play football in her brand new school shoes). Though she was a modest woman, she was quite proud to generally have the balance spot on. However, as she watched the princess excitedly plan the most beautiful princess dress for the occasion, the mother found herself getting a little anxious. The princess had been told before, how silly it was to be a princess – friends believed it was now time to be ‘girls’. The mother had visions of the princess arriving at the ball, full of excitement and delight only to have the girls laugh at her. The very thought broke the mother’s heart and so, she subtly went about changing the princess’s mind. The mother was not proud of her actions but her desire to protect her daughter from potentially feeling bad about herself was strong. The princess duly changed her mind and wore a lovely, but considerably less wonderful dress than she originally intended. The princess attended the ball dressed as a girl like many others. From the moment the princess left the house, the mother was riddled with guilt. She had always prided herself on encouraging the princess to be and do whatever she chose. She had always tried to teach her that it really didn’t matter what anyone else thought, the princess’ happiness came first and foremost. The mother firmly believed that her daughter could be anything she wanted to be and any other person trying to stop that had their own battles to fight. Yet there went the princess, going to the ball dressed as a normal girl, and her mother was solely to blame. Some of the other girls had decided that they were, in fact, princesses too and had dressed accordingly. The mother had failed the princess and was attacked by a vicious bout of Mumguilt. The princess thoroughly enjoyed the ball and didn’t think twice about what she was wearing – after all an outfit does not determine how wonderful an event will be or how genuine friends will treat you. The mother made a vow to never question the princess’ choices again. She would continue to encourage her to be the independent and sassy little girl she had always admired and endeavoured to support her no matter what until the end of time. They all lived happily ever after…until the princess was about 10 and hormones and stuff kicked in then they butted heads for the next 10 years. The End

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Reception class starter: A users guide.

Anna — Tue, 04 Sep 2018 18:10:49 +0000

Dear Teaching Staff, First of all, I would like to take this moment to congratulate you on your decision to become a co-carer of the Seth Version 1.0. I am sure you will be delighted with your new acquisition. Although the creators consider the Seth v.1.0 to be practically perfect, I am enclosing a users guide for this particular version. The Seth v.1.0 will be sent to you, fully charged, every morning. Unfortunately this particular version does run out of fuel quite quickly and by lunchtime may show signs of possible malfunction due to hunger. These signs can include a CBA attitude and a bit of a grump. This will be resolved instantly with food. Whilst we will send the Seth v.1.0 to you shiny and clean every day, we do not expect it returned in similar fashion. This device is adept at seeking out muck in the cleanest of places and so will become tarnished at the first given opportunity. This version of the Seth is fitted with a fully functioning language chip. We have set this to ‘English’ as a primary language and it generally works well. We have noticed, however, that at times of excitement/annoyance this chip can default to ‘gibberish’. If this happens, a soft reset* should fix it straight away. The Seth v.1.0 was also designed with a ‘mimic’ function (though neither creator is taking credit for this). After four and a half years of study, even our experts aren’t entirely sure how it works, it seems to be activated when the Seth v.1.0 is being corrected or is in ‘humour’ mode. Unfortunately, surrounding devices may not be in ‘humour’ mode at the same time and it can trigger annoyance in other devices. The vast knowledge of our experts has determined that staying silent is the only way to disable the mimic function – any research you undertake regarding this would be received with interest. Like many similar models, the Seth comes complete with opposable thumbs and is capable of the ‘tripod’ grip required for writing, however it will default from ‘write’ to ‘scribble’. If a moment of letter forming does happen to occur, the unit will rectify this by putting itself into ‘scribble’ mode and remove the perfectly formed letter. This model of the Seth has been designed to interact and be compatible with other similar devices, and is largely successful when in this mode. There are rare occasions where this feature will falter and ‘warning’ noises will be emitted from the device, usually if a similar device doesn’t want to pair. Again, a soft reset* will usually rectify this immediately. The unit comes with three physical speeds – ‘Snail pace’, ‘normal’ and ‘train’. For reasons unknown, the unit is often stuck in ‘train’, unless of course you need to manoeuvre it at speed when it will quickly put itself into ‘snail pace‘ mode. ‘Normal’ is rarely used. On the plus side, this version of the Seth will never be able to sneak up on you. At times the Seth v.1.0 can become quite tactile offering hugs and words of encouragement. Unfortunately, as speed is often set to ‘train’ a hug can often be mistaken for a rugby tackle. As primary creator and receiver of such hugs, I can assure you it is meant in the kindest possible way. The words of encouragement often include “You’re the best….ever”, “Just be brave” and “You can do it”. The Seth v.1.0 comes with two volume settings – ‘asleep’ and ‘loud’. As the recharging of the unit will be done at home, you will mostly experience use in the ‘loud’ setting. For reasons unknown, a volume control was not included with this version. I can only apologise for that and assure you that the designer for that function was duly reprimanded. Despite the possible glitches outlined that may occur with the Seth v.1.0 we have decided that this version will remain the only one. We are sure that you will enjoy your daily interactions with him as much as we do. You can do it! *A soft reset is performed by removing the Seth v.1.0 from the situation causing the malfunction and bringing a train/vehicle/other exciting object into view.

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Fairytale Corner: The Princess and the Mum who thought too much.

Reception class starter: A users guide.