“Affection is responsible for nine-tenths of whatever solid and durable happiness there is in our lives”
July 13, 2016
This week Victoria Beckham shared a gorgeous picture on Instagram of her giving her daughter Harper a kiss. Who could have anticipated the controversy that would arise from such a sweet, innocent picture of affection between a parent and child?
Comments on the picture were fantastically unpleasant. It was ‘disgusting’. It was ‘pervy’. It’s like ‘they’re making out’ Seriously?!? A mum, kissing her five year old daughter is disgusting now? Shut. The. Front. Door. When did people become so twisted? I am of the opinion that the people who think there is something wrong with a parent kissing a child on the lips are the people with some pretty weird shit going on in their heads and maybe they should be more concerned about that than about someone showing their child innocent affection. Kissing our children is the most natural, wonderful thing ever and we shouldn’t feel like people are judging us for showing our children affection. As we all know, our children won’t want our kisses or cuddles forever. Very soon they will be far too cool to want to hold our hands or anything so we should enjoy being able to have these moments with our children while we can. Without other people imposing their negative thoughts on to it. Even writing this now I’m questioning my language, wondering if people are going to read my words with a perverted, less than innocent undertone. Maybe they are but that’s THEIR demon not mine.
The people who take issue with us sharing affection with our children are the same people who make me question things like how short Aoife’s shorts are. I fret a lot that if she wears short shorts will people think she’s dressing in a sexual way? If her dress is a bit short will people think bad? Should I let her play on the beach in just shorts? Is her swim suit a bit too small? Aoife is five. She wants to wear something comfortable that doesn’t hinder her playing and ideally contains at least four colours or varying patterns. These are her primary concerns and that’s how it should be. She doesn’t care what you think, she doesn’t care if you think it’s too short or too long, too loose or too tight. The grown ups around also shouldn’t care, they shouldn’t hold a negative supposition. Our babies grow up so fast, let’s just smother them with kisses and cuddles while they still allow us to. Let’s embrace them wearing short shorts* and skirts and vests while they are still young and don’t care about body image. Let’s just let our children be children and enjoy every minute of it without having to second guess whether someone else finds it appropriate or not. And to those people thinking these things are ‘pervy’ and ‘disgusting’? Go outside, stretch in the sunlight, take a deep breath and get over it. *This is probably very hypocritical of me but I do draw the line at padded bras and pants/shorts with things like ‘Hussy’ or whatever written on the bum in studs. Too much.