Ah, confidence. It’s the one thing that dictates many of our social experiences and decisions as we grow into adulthood. A lack of it can leave us feeling relatively put-out and envious of people who have it, but we may also increase in humility, which is, in itself, quite an honourable emotion to feel.
However, confidence can leave us feeling engaged and excited to see the world outside, to try new styles, and to speak our mind freely. While having confidence is certainly superior to lacking it, it’s true that confidence is just like a hosepipe – it’s where you point it that matters.
But how can confidence be defined? You might ask yourself this question when considering wearing that evening gown for your marriage date night, or if you wish to tell someone in your life how you really feel. Confidence cannot be forced, as it’s not a vessel to be filled, but a fire to be kindled.
So, how can we define and kindle this fire? Like any important subject matter, it’s best to discuss it with those you feel respect for. So, let’s discuss it together:
Having Fun With Style
Have fun with your style. However, you choose to express yourself, from wearing short hair to dying it bright red or getting new tattoos, the more you can represent yourself through modest or expressive means, the better. Have fun with your style. Enjoyable minimal eyeglasses made in Austria or enjoy wearing fabulous, large-framed horned glasses that emphasize your character. This can help you realize that you need not dress for anyone else (outside of a work context) but you can have fun with your own rules, and find your own authentic self. This all rests on the ability to:
It’s important to stay honest about your needs and personal desires. This can help you avoid pretending to be someone else around other people, or it may grant you the means to speak your true intentions. Furthermore, if you are unquestionably yourself, you’re much more likely to be less troubled by those who do not like you. When we feel misunderstood, we’re more likely to feel affected by the tides of social discourse, but if we unapologetically understand ourselves, that outside justification needn’t be something that trips us up. These insights can sound like platitudes, but you’d be surprised just how rooted in truth they are.
Understanding & Breaking Your Limits
It’s important to understand and break your limits if you can. For instance, confidence is not just feeling great in your body, it’s in heading to the gym to perform stretches, or in enjoying yoga lessons to improve it as well. This becomes a positive cycle of self-confidence growth that helps you think more objectively about who you are, and what you have achieved.
If you trust yourself to make the right decisions, and you take care of yourself, you are, every day, confirming that you are more than enough. When you begin to feel this in your bones, you simply never have to have someone tell you just how fantastic you are, because you’ll be self-satisfied. You would be astonished just how this can start changing your mindset, and it’s also revolutionary to recognize anyone can feel this way. You needn’t be the smartest, the most athletic, or the most good looking to feel great about yourself, and make the most of what you have. For some, that just means becoming more flexible, or meditating more. For others, it means curating a social circle to become more positive instead of staying in touch with toxic friends. These small additions can mean the world for most people, and that has to be a net positive.
Rooting For You
It’s you who you have to deal with everyday, and so it’s you that you should be rooting for. Even if you have many people who rely on you, you cannot work well for them unless you first believe in yourself. This is a golden rule. Treat yourself as if you were a friend you are responsible for helping. Again, that confirms, in your own mind, that you are worth it daily.
This is more than just a platitude. The simple phrase ‘I can do this’ before heading into an important meeting, or going on the first date in twenty years can help you begin to pursue that which you want. This way, you’re more likely to root for yourself and develop your self-confidence in the best possible way.
With the advice above, we hope you can understand how to define self-confidence by routinely treating yourself as if you have it.
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